09.04.08
response/retort
earson:
eyeson:
thoughton:
my response:
of course - as structured - and you knew this - there simply is no retort for such an eloquently constructed and delicately diplomatic conversation ender such as the letter below.
thank you very much for the help you've provided in this instance and absolutely, you've yet again bailed me out of an extremely tight bind.
i apologize for my tone earlier today, a combination of factors made the timing a bit off for discussing budgeting. although i do appreciate the offer of assistance for the 12th time? or the 13th. it was uncouth of you in the end to divulge my financial straits with my mother via a copied email. touche. i'll absolutely think about every other option before i turn to your checkbook again, as it seems the return was timely but limited. you have caused quite an uproar with your structured suggestions.
thank -you- again.
as always,
emily.
---
his retort #1, cc'd to my mother:
Emily
I wanted to send you one note regarding all the things I've agreed to take care of - already done - and then this under separate cover so as not to have any confusion...
Paying Dental bills shouldn't be confused with for paying for stupidity...
I'm disgusted with you and your miserable indifference to my offer to help with your finances. "Whatever?" You called me hysterical and unable to speak and I get a "whatever" when I offer help with a budget? What the hell is that?
You went from hysterical with no cash, to happy with my cash, to indifferent now that the problem for this moment is solved... You're irresponsible and I'm done paying the bill...
The next time you have a situation where you've overdrawn your account, crash the damn car or otherwise have your head up your ass, do not expect me to be your 'wallet'... that's over and done with.
One thousand dollars overdrawn and you have no damn idea what the hell you spent it on? ... Grow the hell up already.
You don't want advice - or help for that matter - I'm not giving it, so here it is plain and simple:
Get your shit together, your head out of your ass and think about what risks you're exposing our daughter to.
You aren't a danger to our daughter - yet - you bounced checks and overdrew your account, the sky isn't falling and that's fine - but be damn sure my daughter is not hurt in the process while you continue to ignore basic realities and paint yourself the victim of everyone elses disdain. Take some damn responsibility for your own actions and GROW THE HELL UP already.
Take note and be very, very careful Emily. . .
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his retort #2, addressed to me directly:
Em
Apology accepted... but what next? Nothing of course. 'Appreciate' the offer? really?
And now you have bookends... the diplomatic with the plain spoken.
Uncouth? I'll tell you what's uncouth... allowing my daughter to sleep on the damn floor in that pig stye of a bed room... letting things get so far out of hand ... letting Zoe call the shots while her teeth rot, abdicating your parental authority, calling to say 'how are you' when all you really want and all you've ever wanted is to have someone bail you out every time you screw up - which seems to have become a past-time for you.
I knew when you called to say 'hello' some days in advance that an open hand was sure to follow... and sure enough... as predicted there you were. As I live and breath I knew it...
Uncouth?
You have no idea about 'uncouth'... no that's wrong - you know uncouth intimately.
My wallet is empty. Save yourself the embarrassment and don't call me about anything except as it relates to Z ... but by now you know that already.
Uproar with my 'structured' suggestions? My god... if that's the cause of the uproar ...
I'm done with it Emily - don't waste my time with your triflings. You don't like that I cc'ed dear mom... tough shit. She's calling me to pay the dentist bills and doctor bills not you. She has a right to know that I've helped you out of the shit storm you seem to drive into every few months.. hell ... It may be more often for all I know... you only call I suppose when it's ridiculously out of hand.
You write for soccer equipment because you screwed it up again...
Save your righteous indignation - it doesn't suit you.
---
my response:
wasn't it you -
in the end -
who decided we were no better than business partners?
good enough.
---
his retort:
Don't kid yourself - you're no partner.
written at 10:55 p.m.
